Yaya ranting: Things I learned from the youngest and oldest maid

If you think you have read the end of my yaya ranting... you are wrong! The saga continues to yaya 07 to yaya 08. And now, it is just Elle Marie and Mama again... soooo happy together!

This roller coaster experience of hiring and firing/ letting go of yaya is just too exhausting for me... I don't think I am setting high standards for my yayas. All I am asking for were breakfast, lunch and dinner for Noy; take extra care of Elle Marie's things (especially her 3 precious cabinets); regularly clean Elle Marie's play area; do the laundry at their own convenience; she eats what we eat; I am with Elle Marie 24/7. At times, I blame myself for my shortcomings. Noy said, I shouldn't expect too much but I always argue "Isn't my life supposed to be lighter because we have them?" I am no saint but I can be evil if the situation calls for it.

I remember Yaya 07, she came after Harlene who came with her sister Patpat in May (I don't consider Harlene a maid rather a big sister to Elle hence she is not counted). Yaya 07 is a distant relative of Nong Endring, Noy'smost trusted farm caretaker and our ninong. She is the 4th of 12 siblings!!! She claims that she was maltreated by her former boss for one year! She is 16 and the youngest among the 8 maids we had so far.

Yaya 07's first day with us was an OK except for the fact that she looked sickly and always complain about her back. So we told her to prioritize Elle Marie's clothes and just wash out clothes if she is well already.

The second day was different, just when I putted Elle to her regular afternoon nap, Yaya 07 came to me and cried aboout her back. So I massage her back with the chinese ointment that Sharon gave me. I told her to rest after lunch and prepare the dinner around 6pm. So, she is sleeping (or watching tv on the second floor) from 1:00-5:00p.m. Around 7:00p.m. she came to me again, this time complaining about her hands. She said they are shaking. So, I got my spa tub massage her hands and even applied my special exfoliating/relaxing foaming soap on her hands. Take note: I looked for the spa tub, cleaned it, heated water and arranged everything on one side of our dining room. I did everything while she was crying on the side and holding her hands. Day 3... day 4... the same thing that happened to day 2 started to be a regular routine for me. Aside from taking good care of my daughter, we hired a yaya to add to my load.

I wondered how come everytime she is about to wash the dishes or wash Elle's clothes, Yaya 07's everything aches but everytime we bring her to the grocery or the mall she is high spirited! all dressed up! all made up (she even tried to borrow mascara from my sister!!!)! I remember our first and only visit to SM department store, I wanted to see how she is with Elle Marie alone so I left Elle Marie with her and pretended to window shop and monitor them from a distance. I was VERY furious because I saw her tinker with the items on sale and did not even bother to look at what Elle Marie was doing!

This one really made my day! While me and my sister went around for Elle Marie's new clothes for school, we left a couple of newly purchased things with her to watch. I don't know what made her think that she can go window shopping while working! She left the plastic bags with Noy who was taking good care of Elle Marie! Just imagine my good spirited husband, together with three big plastic bags of clothes, one big baby bag running after Elle Marie! I scolded Yaya 07 but I also scolded Noy for letting her do it too him.

Yaya 07 stayed with us for almost two weeks. Noy agreed with me that she was becoming a burden to us instead of a help which is what hired her for. I know she needs money to support her family (who doesn't need money?) but, I'd rather do everything on my own instead of doing everything while she watches me!

And then... Yaya 08 came. She was recommended by our friend, Aiken. She is a cousin of her yaya so we thought her yaya is ok so this one must be ok too. I have been very particular about our yaya's age. I don't want a yaya who is older than me because of my previous experience with Yaya 01 but, I relaxed this pre-requisite and hired Yaya 08.

I know I am not the prettiest girl on earth (maybe in my subconciousness I am/ maybe 4 years ago I was to Noy) but to be politically correct Yaya 08 looks scary. She has a pointed nose and chin; no teeth; dark, very dry skinned; curly (buhaghag) hair. She looks like a true to life witch! (everybody who saw her made the same comment) All of Elle Marie's friends are afraid of her that is why I don't usually bring her with us to playdates or to Elle Marie's school. In fairness to her, she is very clean (except for the bad looking make up), sweet, always smiling, and ready to do anything you ask her to.

Yaya 08 already had a first warning from us when she failed to go back after an overnight day off because she was too drunk. Not coming back on the agreed time and day is a big no! no! to me and Noy. We already agreed that any yaya who would do it will automatically be fired. But since Yaya 08 is ok to us, we bended the policy and gave her a second chance. Yes, Yaya 08 is very ok to us. She met every need we had at home so I told Noy that maybe it is time that I seriously look for work. So, I tried to give Yaya 08 time alone with Elle Marie to bond.

But, this did not happen because the moment I leave Elle Marie with her all alone (e.g. I take a bath or go to our second floor) Elle Marie screams on top of her lungs! I never heard Elle Marie screamed like that before. It happened for almost seven consecutive days and Elle Marie started to have slight fever.

I remember it was Tues I left Elle Marie with her on the play area while I do my emails in the second floor. I heard a scream and really loud bangs on the door. It was Elle Marie crying while Yaya 08 looked from the bottom of the stairs. First question, why did she let Elle Marie go up the stairs on her own?! Second question, how can she be a mother to four kids and doesn't know how to appease my daughter?! Third question, doesn't she observe me and Elle Marie and take note of the things that Elle loves? These are the question I did not hesitate to ask her. I was frustrated because she has been with us for almost one month and still she couldn't stay with Elle Marie a single minute?!

Wednesday came, I wanted to take a bath on my own (without Elle Marie in the CR) so again I left Elle with her. Again, screaming! crying! everything! So I was forced to end my bath and took Elle Marie away from her! I told her that I was too frustrated with the fact that Elle Marie is getting sick because of her (I guess with the stress of being with her alone). I asked her what she will do with Elle Marie if I start working. She said, she will let her cry because for sure she will stop. I was very furious! How dare she do it to my daughter?!!! I walked out on her and brought Elle Marie to school.

Sharon was just telling me to get her maid after they leave for Singapore when I got a text from Noy that Yaya 08 is not used to being scolded especially by someone way younger than her and is asking permission to go home on Saturday. There goes Yaya 08. But before she left, she created a scene in our house. She talked to Noy crying as if I maltreated her. Told him stories about how I would shout and get sngry with her. When I confronted her, she told me "bakit mo naman kasi pinagpipilitan sa akin iyang anak mo e ayaw nga sa akin". This one REALLY pissed me off! I screamed "the reason why we are giving you a higher rate is because I plan to leave my daughter with you when I work! We can always have our clothes done in a laundry shop or hire a weekly labander or I can do it myself! I can cook for Noy! So, if Elle Marie doesn't like you, there is no need for you in this house!". Nahimasmasan siya...pero mas nahimasmasan ako now that I was able to narrate this experience. mabigat kasi.

I had single, married, very young, very old, mature I wonder what is the right formula for me and my yaya should be. Sharon's maid is 43 years old. I always see her in Sharon's place. She is single and very quiet. Do you think she is the one? Let us see... she will start August 15.

Yaya ranting: A certified Mom with 5 yaya experiences...

It was just this morning that i was sending ym to a friend telling her that i can now go back to work because my new yaya seems okey for elle. I ym'ed too soon! Around 6:00p.m. my new yaya for one week left me.

It was around 4:00p.m. my yaya approached me and asked permission to go to Payatas and stay there overnight. I was surprised because it was late to ask permission for a day off. Added to that, I need somebody with Elle tonight because I have to finalize my presentation for the workshop that I will facilitate next week and Noy is out of town. I asked her why the urgency and she shared with me that her boyfriend has a headache and has been insisting that she go to payatas to nurse him! Tumaas kilay ko! She continued that her boyfriend instructed her to look for another work if I don't allow her to go. Dito, tumaas blood pressure ko!

I calmly told my yaya to go back to her room and think about what she is saying. I don't think there is any urgency with a headache unless he had an accident or in a hospital, i will allow her to go. But the fact that he can still text, he can still go out and drink paracetamol. If I allow her to go tonight, he will ask her again to take a day off anytime he wishes. And, I don't like that idea! She can start looking for a new employer if she wishes.

After a few minutes, my yaya came back to me saying that she wants to stay with me, she just needs to see her boyfriend tonight. I told her go, i will not stop her. She cried and went packing...

This yaya is already my fifth yaya since I gave birth to Elle. She has the shortest stay with us-one week.

Yaya 01

My first yaya was Noy's distant, distant, distant relative. She is older than me by six years but smaller. She joined us three weeks after i gave birth to elle. She was okey during her first few months but started to deteriorate when her friend gave her a phonepal. She started using her cellphone 24/7! There was one time that she forgot to turn off our electric stove and nearly burned our apartment!!! Good thing my sister was left home and saw the fire!

One fine day, I asked her to dress Elle with her pink jeans over white shirt. She dressed Elle with a black leggings and blue tops. When I saw what Elle was wearing, I asked her if she knows the color pink and what jeans mean... I think she got offended and started to answer me back in a very loud voice. We ended shouting at each other inside the car on our way to Quezon City until Noy told her to stop!

When we got to my aunt's house in Quezon City, she told me that she wants to leave us and I said you better but after christmas (it was December 21) because we are having a christmas party at home and she is part of it plus she won't be able to get a ticket that soon back to Bacolod. She said (and I will never forget this line) "Ate, walang makakapigil sa akin sa pag alis, kahit kaladkarin mo pa ako!" The guts! So I told her to leave at that very moment! I told my husband to bring her back home to pack and I don't want to see her when I get back from our shopping!

She did left but it never ended there. She stayed with my sister-in-law's house in bacolod and took P20,000 cash. After one month, I also realized that she took away my old nokia phone. She called my neighbor's helper and told her that I am "bruha". That helper told my then new yaya which she also shared with me. So I told my neighbor about what her helper has been doing. She ended up crying and banned from talking to my then new yaya.

Yaya 02

My second yaya was from La Paz, Iloilo City. It was my father who recommended her to me. She is educated (reached 2nd year college) but had to work because they are having financial problems. She is nice, jolly and playful. I love the way she dresses Elle and the way she arranges Elle's hair. The only problem is that she has hearing problem and keeps on doing things different from my instructions! I had to give her up because we learned that she has a big cyst at the back of her waist which makes it impossible for her to carry heavy loads. I need someone to help carry heavy loads for me because of my hypertension that time. We still see each other in Iloilo and once in awhile text text text.

Yaya 03

Among my five yayas, this one is the worst! I never liked her the first time I saw her but was forced to get her. That is one greatest mistake I had to pay dearly. When she first came to our house in iloilo for an interview she brought her 3 month old baby and mother. The whole interview her mother kept on talking and talking... She even told me that "sana di ako magselos sa anak nya kasi yong dati nyang amo nagselos sa kanya"... This turned me off! In fairness, her daughter is not that physically pretty for my standards! I don't think Noy will ever make a second look on her (I know Noy's taste!) And for goodness sake, why would i be jealous of her?!! I am confident that Noy has eyes only for me!

So, I brought her with me to Manila. All day long she would talk and talk and talk and talk. If not talking, she would backbite my Yaya 02, which is supposed to be her bestfriend! I can tolerate her talking and talking but one thing I cannot tolerate is using my personal things.

It was Elle's birthday celebration in Pangasinan. We are having a party and I sent her off ahead of us because we would not fit inside our pick up. When I finally arrived, I saw her wearing my black, havaianas imitation slippers! I bought that slippers for P49.99 from Market! Market! (I also have a white slipper just like that one.) Price doesn't matter, what matters for me is that those are MY SLIPPERS! My sisters would not dare use it because I would not dare use their slippers! I really got mad! Funny, I still did not asked her to leave! BUT just a fews days after that my loving husband did.

It was her birthday. She did not ask for a day off so I told her to go with my aunt to divisoria so that she can shop for her baby. She did but called around 6:00p.m. saying that she is with her cousin in Sta Cruz and could not come back home because she is not feeling well. The good Ella in me told her to take a cab and I will pay for her fare. I could also fetch her from where she is if she is really not feeling well as long as she comes home because I don't want her to sleep anywhere I am not familiar with. She said yes. Then 10p.m. came... 12:00 midnight... no call, no text, no nothing. I was worried that she fainted on her way home. The next day, 12:00 noon came, 3:00p.m. then 7:00p.m. she arrived.

I promised Noy I will leave the talking to him when she comes home but failed because I was alone when she arrived. I told her to pack her things and go to wherever she wishes to go. She cried but that's one major no, no that she did to us. She was with us for only one month.

Yaya 04

This yaya came and go as swiftly as her weight. She was recommended by our neighbor when she saw me doing the laundry. This yaya cooks VERY bad! She cleans VERY bad! Worst, you cannot leave Elle with her. Noy's hypothesis: Elle is afraid of her because she looks like an alien. (We are exactly not the best looking people in this world but that's just our realistic hypothesis) She has big bulging eyes that could almost fall out from her face, really thin body(malnourished looking), and long thick curly hair. I can tolerate the bad tasting food because it makes me loose weight, the cluttered house because I am used with it BUT the fact that Elle doesn't want to look worse hold her is different. Good thing she asked permission to go home to Bohol so that she can take good care of her mom. Our hypothesis: she heard us talk about changing her because I am very frustrated that she could not help me with Elle. We let her go with a smile:-) and Elle was very happy. She stayed with us for one month (take note, during her first two weeks, it was not evident that Elle doesn't want to go with her because Hargy was with us. He is Noy's inaanak from Pangasinan. We asked him to jon us so that Elle can have a playmate)

This is my life... These are the yayas that I have to go through just to stress the point that yes! i am a certified mother because I have yaya blues! Since our project completed in August, I accepted a few part-time jobs but have been taking good care of Elle. Yes, I am faithful that God will eventually bless me with a good yaya. Someone trustworthy to take good care of my dear Elle Marie...