Waiting anxiously for this stage to last...

Just awhile ago, I had a serious discussion with my daughter Elle Marie about her long-time crush Lawrence.

Mama: Elle, who said that Lawrence is your boyfriend?
Elle: Me
Mama: Why is he your boyfriend?
Elle: Because I love him
Mama: Does Arian have a boyfriend?
Elle: No
Mama: How about Denise?
Elle: No
Mama: O, then why do you have a boyfriend?
Elle: But, I like Lawrence!
Mama: I think you mean Lawrence is your friend right?
Elle: Yes
Mama: Ok, Lucas is your friend right?
Elle: No
Mama: Ha?! Why not?
Elle: Lawrence only
Mama: Santi is your friend right?
Elle: No, only lawrence

I have nothing against Lawrence. He is a good boy... good looking, came from a good family, maybe he will grow up to be the boy next door every Mom would want her daughter to introduce as her boyfriend BUT not at 5!

When will my daughter stop this "Lawrence" stage in her life?! I am getting impatient! I don't even know how it started! All I can recall is that while in Senior Nursery, Lawrence was the crush nang bayad! and I thought Elle would outgrow it! Not no!

My first official crush was when I was in grade 3. I have this chubby looking classmate whom I really like because he iwas so intelligent! But, I don't talk about him much... I don't think anybody knew that I like him. Yes, I was in grade 3 and I was only 9 going 10 that time! And my daughter just turned 5! and she is talking about marrying Lawrence and going out to watch a movie with him?! duh?!

I don't know whether I am feeling this way because my daughter is too young to have a serious crush or because Lawrence doesn't return her affection. Yes, my heart is torn into pieces every time I witness Lawrence ignore Elle. I cannot endure seeing my daughter brokenhearted. I cannot bear the thought that she is crying over a guy!

During my younger days, I safeguarded my heart by having multiple crushes. I told myself that it pays to have so many crushes at least I don't feel bad if a crush ignores me. When Noy first broke my heart, I told myself that I don't deserve to be treated that way. I convinced myself that I deserve better and focused myself to other guys. When my ex and I broke up, I told myself that it was better that way at least I discovered that there were other guys just waiting for me to be unattached...

For now, I am convincing myself that Elle will get over this "Lawrence" stage in her life and maybe find another boy to really, really like. What is important for me is that fact that my daughter is opening up to me and that there is open communication between us.

If ever I get to talk to her again about this boyfriend thinggy... I would tell her that based on my experience, it is ok to appreciate guys but it also pays to wait for the right time... which nobody knows when! Just look at her Mama and Papa, we waited and now we have her and Bien!

One Step to Stardom...

When I first learned that I was having a baby girl in 2006 I told myself that I will be really, really happy if I see her photo in a magazine! As early as first month, I started sending Elle's photos to different parenting magazines. I told myself that if I see her photo in a magazine at least once, I will stop but now on her 5th year, I still have not realized this dream.

I know that my daughter is beautiful inside and out but kiddie modeling is not all about looks... part of it requires the commitment of the parents 24/7! which Noy and I don't have.

Of course, I have the heart to ensure that my daughter always look good but I don't have patience to fall in line for modeling searches, vtrs and shoots!

I was once approached by a talent agent while shopping asking if I want Elle to do a vtr with them. That was two years ago. I did not bring Elle to their agency because I got too busy with work.

Recently without my prior knowledge, my sister Nenette posted Elle's photo in a kiddie modeling search. Elle Marie was shortlisted and was requested to do pictorial and interview last Sunday!

Right after Bien Mary's birthday party, we went straight to Festival Mall in Alabang in full force! Lola Marlyn-the cheerer, Tita Nene-the Manager, Tita Bebe-the Trainer, Mama-the stage mother and Papa-the driver!

I told myself that I will not be a stage mom and make my daughter conscious and uncomfortable. Hence, I let my talented sister, Bebe to go with Elle since there can only be one companion per kid. From a distance, I saw my sister orient Elle.

During the pictorial, I wasn't able to stop myself and went near Elle as the kuya help her with her poses. I was so proud of my daughter! Come vtr time, I did not go with her inside the room. We all waited outside and watch her pose in the television outside the room.

Of course for me, my daughter is the most beautiful among the kids that came! Hehehe Que sera sera... whatever will be will be...

I really don't plan to turn my daughter into a professional model. We took the effort and time to go to this search to boost her confidence and "for the experience of it".

No pressure Anak! Again, for me, you are the epitome of beauty, grace and intellegence... I love you!

Ate Elle Marie sings Happy Birthday for Baby Bien

For me, what really made Baby Bien’s 1^st birthday party special was Ate Elle Marie singing Happy Birthday in Chinese for her dear baby sister…

If only I was able to capture that moment in video, I would someday show it and tell my then grown up daughters how much they love each other ever since they were very young.

I would tell Bien Mary that it was not easy for her Ate Elle to sing in public. In fact, it was her first time to sing in front of almost 120 people live and with little preparation but she made it through because she wanted to do something special just for her baby sister.

I would tell Elle Marie that during that very moment I wished for the time to stop and spend my whole life just watching and listening to her lovely voice even though I don’t understand Chinese! That me, Bien and her Papa are very proud of her!

I would tell Elle Marie that she is beautiful inside and out. Her singing prowess is God’s gift. She should thank God by nourishing it and never hesitating to share it with the public.

I would tell Elle Marie that I love her and Bien Mary. They are God’s greatest gift to me!

Our dear Bien Mary is now 1!

My youngest daughter, Bien Mary turned 1 today. We started with merienda in their favorite, Jollibee where Bien got her first real treat of Jollibee Spaghetti with Coke! Yes, my daughter’s first encounter with not so healthy food but who cares? It’s her birthday today and she gets to do and eat anything she likes to! Hahaha… She also got to buy her own silver and and purple shoes that she will pair with her purple gown on her birthday party this Sunday.

Seems like yesterday that I was worrying about my pregnancy because of high blood pressure and two threatened abortion incidences. I got too scared that I was forced to resign from work. I thought I was going to loose Bien that time but God is good. Bien Mary is for me and Noy.

On this very special day of my pretty daughter Bien Mary, I wish her First to have good health, no more convulsion incidences, rushing to the Emergency Room or fever or colds. Second is to remain a happy baby. Retain her big smile and positive outlook in life. Last is to remain good to her Ate Elle Marie, Mama and Papa…

To our dear Bien Mary, happy, happy birthday to you!

We love you…